To have and to hold ... in separate accounts

Guardian Unlimited Money | News_ | To have and to hold ... in separate accounts: "She combed registry offices and wedding fairs to find 42 couples prepared to give separate interviews and asked them about their intentions. Some 69% used spoke of 'permanence' and growing old together; 59% said it was the right thing and, almost apologetically, used the word 'tradition'; 49% said 'commitment'; 44% said it seemed the next logical step; and 38% talked of public affirmation."

Interesting eh? It'd be interesting to see a breakdown of the figures quoted; noting that 'permanence' and 'commitment' could overlap semantically in this case did the spread of the use of such terms put things nearer 100%? It seems to me, in the light of the real figures for divorce, to emphasise that the crisis in marriage nowadays is not about intentions [or at least conscious ones] but of negotiating how to do it in the long haul. I write this against the background over the last 6 months of hearing of the marriages of three sets of people I respect and care about having caved in and with the prospect of my 18th wedding anniversary next Monday [Tracy and I are amazed and glad we're still going strong].

I am particularly interested in the public affirmation bit too: since a mantra of the latter part of the 20th century with regard to marriage was "it's between the two of us"; is there in this a return to a recognition that marriage is actually a social thing too [as I used to try to get over in marraige preparation in parish ministry]?

Then there's the significance of the seperate bank accounts. Intersting ly enough Tracy and I have just taken tthe step of having an account each which is separate and single: in my case because I need a fees from business account and in her case to stash away money for treats. At one time I would have seen separate accounts as tantamount to reneging on marriage vows. Yet still I wonder whether separate accounts for newly weds is actually a sign of something more profoundly disquieting from the keeping options open culture we live in: since money is probably THE major medium of independence, is it a tacit declaration that marriage may be breakable? Or is it a sign of healthy ability to remain individuals? Or something of both?

I know I will continue to mull this over. Anyone want to join in?