Empathy and its prayerful discontents

The focus of the article that is linked to the title is different to what I'm thinking about here. But I did find it helpful to see someone else articulating my own concerns about the 'magic bullet' that is empathy. And in fact extending it a bit. I want to consider the flaws in empathy in relation to our praying, particularly praying together.

So here's what this article says about the downsides of empathy (selectively quoted by me).

1. Ineffective EmpathyWhen our heartstrings are pulled toward a multitude of charitable and social justice causes our resources become spread and diluted, decreasing their ability to make an impact. ... In short, empathy--a compassionate desire to help--doesn't always lead to actual helping. ...
2. Empathy and Violence... empathy can lead to violence. ... it causes us to demonize people. A lot of our politics is motivated by empathy, care, and concern for the suffering in the world. But that empathy creates moralistic aggression toward political opponents. Angelic Good Guys fighting against demonic Bad Guys. ...  
3. Empathy and Sacrifice... we can feel loads and loads of empathy but still not do anything. ... Empathy is vital, but it's a far cry from self-sacrificial love. We're addicted to compassion. We take a pass on agape.
4. Empathic Distress... When we witness the distress of others we sympathetically feel their distress in our own bodies. ... empathy creates an emotional and somatic burden. As we watch social media [etc] day after day, ... sympathetic stress leads to empathy burnout. Chronic anxiety. Depression. Physical exhaustion. Emotional numbness.

So, there are quite a few reasons to be wary of empathy. It isn't a short-cut to thinking about agapaic love, it may lay a foundation for developing it but only as part of intentional formation to swerve by its downsides. My own earlier concerns are represented in the list above particularly in the one on violence: empathy as a group-building, identification solidifying thing actually lays foundations for distrust and demonisation of out-groups, perhaps related to ineffective empathy (the first of the list) because all our empathic consideration and attention is taken up by the close exposure to and concern for those closest to us. Hence the need for the parable of the good Samaritan, I suppose...